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It’s not because you will not be able to survive without him. Then why act so shocked and devastated when outcome is so predictable? What I want to do is show you how to manage them – to protect yourself from continual heartbreak. Sandy was a 45-year-old client living in rural Wisconsin.Men may still frustrate you, but I can make things easier, especially if you use online dating as a means to meet men. You remember that this is how dating is supposed to feel. She had seen a really cute guy on and signed up for my Passion Course to figure out how to get his attention.
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It’s that, if 9 times out of 10 (in real life), the special guy doesn’t turn out to be all that special, it may be smarter to reserve judgment for later.
the feeling of NOT winning the lottery at all when you had 4 numbers (mildly irritating). When the contract is signed, the ink is dry, and you know, without a doubt, that your dating prospect has become your BOYFRIEND.
Until then, each promising man is not actually “real.” He is merely hope, potential and fantasy.
There’s wit, there’s sexual innuendo, there’s instant talk about making plans. But, sure enough, when he shows up, he’s as cute as his picture. You play mini-golf and grab two rounds of drinks at a nearby bar, after which you go back to your place and make out on the couch for an hour. He knew he didn’t want to get into a long-distance relationship, and so, instead of trekking to go on a first date, he emailed Sandy to apologize and wish her well in her search for love. Even though she’d only exchanged a few emails, she’d gotten excited about this cute, successful, articulate, enthusiastic man. She started to dream about this man saving her from a life of loneliness. They really didn’t have any relationship whatsoever.
You have an amazing evening, filled with easy conversation and laughter. You close the restaurant, end with a goodnight kiss, and a promise to do this again soon. In fact, you do a little more than that, but hold a little bit back. He says good night and tells you he’ll call the next day. As a result of this wishful thinking, Sandy was as hurt by this man’s simple email as she would have been if they’d been dating and broken up. She could have that sick feeling in the pit of her stomach and lose sleep over how she’s going to replace him. As a result, Sandy wasn’t “losing” anything; she never had anything to lose. It’s not that Sandy was wrong to look at all the available signs and conclude that she had special connection with a special guy.
You’ll be able to bounce back and persevere instead of quitting. 🙂 I guess I figured that most guys would turn out to be flakes.
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